Don't You
Love it When...
By Ed Rodebush, SGW McIntosh Co.

 

You check a guy, and remember that you caught him last year without a license. Before you can say anymore he tells you, "I got caught last year, so I made sure I had mine this year. I ask did I get you then? He answers, "No it was some old, gray-haired Warden.

A fisherman on the rip rap tells you he left his license in his truck 30 yards away but straight up the steep bank. I ask him to hop up there and get his license. The fisherman stands up and literally starts hopping toward the truck. It is then that I realize this guy has an artificial leg.

Your checking coon hunters at night. You and your partner are sneaking along in the dark when he asks you "Did you bring your pistol?" I reply yes and why? His answer is "Oh I left mine at home again."

You discover that your revolver is empty. You tell your wife and she replies, " Oh I emptied it for you last week."

You step out of your boat to check a bank fisherman and the seat rips out of your pants. This is when if you are living right you did not go commando.

You red light a group of spotlighters and exit your truck to make the arrests, but somebody forgot to put the truck in park.

You exit your boat to check several bank fishermen up and down the bank. Return to your boat and it is 20 yards out in the lake drifting away.

You are approached at the post office by a little old lady. She is upset because someone wrote her 2 granddaughters tickets for fishing without a license. You remember her now and realize that you did this deed. You tell her that you are the one that wrote the tickets. She replies, " No you weren't he was older and fatter than you."

You are after a spotlighter just over the hill. You remember that this hay field had an entrance without a gate, so you swing into the entrance without any lights. You hear that familiar sound of 5 tomcats fighting and you realize farmer Brown had decided to put up a 5 wire fence
through the entrance.

You hear a shot just. up the road in the State Park. You can see someone throw a brown object
into the trunk and shut the lid. You stop the vehicle and have the driver open the trunk. The trunk opens and out jumps a small deer that quickly runs away never to be seen again. It's very disheartening to watch your evidence run away.

You launch your patrol boat only to discover that your partner failed to put in the plug. Then you
realize that you are by yourself.

You lock your keys in your vehicle. No problem I'll get my hideout key hid under the vehicle. You break that key trying to unwire it from the frame.

You are at a restaurant when a lady approaches with little Johnny in hand. The lady tells little Johnny to shake hands with the nice Game Warden. Little Johnny reacts by punching you in the crotch as hard as he can.

You write a hunter for an unplugged gun. He gets mad and lets you know that he is going to quit hunting because you wrote him a ticket. Why do they always get mad when you reply with, "I'll buy that shotgun if the price is right."

You watch a fisherman cast into the water, reel it in and repeat the act. As You approach this guy the line is in the water. You ask "Are they biting?" He answers I'm not fishing , I am practice casting. He reels it in to show you that tied to the end is a big washer and no hook.

You know that an illegal trapper has been working along a creek. You find a truck parked there and have waited 3 hours for the guy to come to the truck. A local farmer drives up and asks you what you are doing. You tell him quickly so he will leave and not mess you up. Farmer Brown then tells you that the truck was broke down and had been there for 2 days.

You are working a booth at the fair and a guy asks you a question. "What do you need to do to be a Game Warden?" I tell him about the test, interview and all the training that is required. He replies "That's good, I think I could do your job, I'm disabled".

You sneak up to Springfield and go to the Bass Pro Shop. While there you run into not one but 2 District chiefs, and one of them is yours! Makes you proud that you were on scheduled vacation time.

You drive leisurely 10 miles to the courthouse. Nothing seems out of the ordinary as far as the traffic on that trip, when a deputy approaches you and tells you that your red lights are flashing on your truck.

You sneak in below the dam late one night after illegal snaggers. There is only 1 vehicle there and you can see 2 subjects down by the water jerking hard on the fishing rods. You pinch yourself and say this must be a dream, it could not get any better than this. You sneak up and make the apprehension. Turn on the flashlight only to see your snaggers are 2 Wardens from 50 miles away. They were sent there to work undercover. There were 4 people below the dam that night and all 4 were Game Wardens.